Ready For Death – Unstoppable Passion

Posted: February 21st, 2009 | Author: eetion | Filed under: death, focus, passion, persistence, purpose | 2 Comments »

Today, I saw a monarch butterfly. There were two lifeless leaves next to the butterfly – the butterfly, which seemed to be slightly wedged beneath the foot of a small plastic chair meant for a child, was dead. The two leaves were a pale brown. The butterfly was a vibrant and alluring color. Various shades of strong orange and deep blacks were spread across it. As I stood there for a moment, looking at the thing, I thought how sad it must be. How awful, for something so full of beauty and life to meet its end so bluntly, like an emotionless cause and effect, and in a way that doesn’t seem beautiful at all. How stifling. But butterflies aren’t the only thing that can die.

Have you ever seen a person die? Do you remember the moment where life seemed to be stolen, or taken back, from the person? Can you imagine witnessing such a moment, feeling that sharp stab to your chest, breaking your entire concept of life as you normally see it, bringing an abrupt awareness to what death is? Let me share my experience with you.

I watched a person die. It made me realize how short this seemingly lengthy series of events, which we call life, really is. Watching that person die, gasping and reaching out and even fighting for life, bore new unexpected feelings into my being. I watched … as those around stood there, just watching … with a sympathetic gaze; we could not help this person though we all wanted to. Death that day was not graceful, was not gentle, was not sudden or sympathetic. After the person had died, I reacted with the feeling that life was being stolen, robbed, taken from this person. I felt more angry than sad that this was happening. This was unfair. That feeling stood next to me for quite awhile, holding my hand, justifying my held back tears and muffled emotion. How awful, for a human being full of life and consciousness to meet their end so bluntly, like an emotionless cause and effect, and in a way that is not beautiful but is painful and teeming with agony.

We are similar to the butterfly that I saw today. The control over when and how we’re born and die is pretty much out of our hands.

I’ve learned some things from the event in the hospital. I have learned is that we should not expect to live for any self-predetermined amount of time. Every good and bad person, every one loved and hated, every religious and non-religious, every man woman and child should expect to die an agonizing and painful death at any moment.

The pain of dying will hurt for a time. You may scream, cry, kick, squirm, and shake. Accept that it will hurt a lot; know that it will not last forever and will pass. Get comfortable with the understanding of the pain involved in death; embrace it, accept it, expect it so that you will not fear it. The pain will not last forever, but our natural course is to live and then die.

I’ve also learned about is the sadness of losing a friend or a family member. The one thought, more than anything else, which shakes the center of my being is Were they ready to die? If the answer to that question were a consistent YES, then I would miss the person but be happy for them, knowing that they were ready. If the answer were to be NO, the feelings that could arise from that, hurt deeper than anything I know. There is a great pain in knowing or even assuming that your loved one or your friend had life taken violently from them when they were not ready.

But this side of the life spectrum, you will never know for certain whether or not another person was ready for death. We know that death can hurt, but the pain you might see on someone’s face when they are dying is no indication of whether or not they were ready for death. I can be mentally ready to take a bullet in the arm, but if I hadn’t told you that before hand, the pain on my face wont tell you one way or the other; such is death. The person who I saw die was gasping for breath, choking and reaching their hands out for life, but even from that I can’t say whether or not that person was ready for death. You see, death is usually a painful endeavor which no one naturally wants to go through. It hurts, and our body reacts, but the bodies reaction to pain is all science and can’t tell us for a fact if one person or another was ready for death in the moment that they died.

Looking at someone’s life history also will not tell you if a person was ready for death when they died. Physical actions do not prepare you for death, nor will a history of physical actions determine whether or not someone was prepared for death. Preparing for death is something that happens in your mind initially and has the potential to give birth to actions from there. For any definite answer to the question of whether or not someone was ready for death, you’d have to dig around into that persons mind to find the answers.

Knowing that I can not know brings me comfort, as well as understanding. From that, I understand that we are independent beings and should, for our own well being, recognize that we are independent beings. If we fall for the idea that we were dependent on each other, having a loved one pass away would then mean that a part of you has died. Don’t fall for that idea. Although you may feel like a part of you has died when a loved one passed away, your level of understanding and your acknowledgement that we are separate beings will bring you comfort.

That is why you and I have to let go of each other. Though we’re all friends and family, we need to understand that we do not control each other and we are really separate beings –that is, your consciousness does not belong to someone else, and no one else’s consciousness belongs to you.

Once you have let go of the fear of death and the fear of others dying, you have done something great for yourself. You have prepared yourself for the inevitable. Now, you no longer run from death and no longer hide from it.

After all of the fear is gone for your own death and the death of others, what’s left? The answer is a beautiful series of precious moments which we call life where we influence one another. Accepting death brings a completely new flavor to life and the actions you take. Your goals, ambitions, life’s purpose, and future happenings should all take a moment to consider the idea that death is where they’re headed.

Take a look at your goals for a second, if you’ve got them handy. What are your goals? For any one of your goals, ask the question “Why?” and then ask yourself “Would I die for this goal?”. Would I die for this goal. That’s a big question and it’s also probably one of the most important ones you should ask yourself.

It’s important to factor death into your goals because whatever it is that you desire, do, think, or [you name it] is going to be the same thing you’re doing, thinking, or [you name it] when you die. Would you be ok with being caught dead doing what you’re doing, thinking what you’re thinking, or [you name it]?

Lets say your top-level goal is to become a millionaire. If that’s your goal, ask yourself why and then ask yourself if you would die for that goal. Are you really willing to die in pursuit of that goal specifically? This is an entirely personal question that you would have to answer for yourself.

Lets look at your goals from another perspective: If a doctor told you that you have one week to live, would would your goals be the same? If not, why then wouldn’t your goals look the same? The only difference between having one week to live, and expecting to live for ninety years, is time. So would your goals change because you don’t have enough time? Let me tell you right now that, on this side of life, you will never have “enough time”, ever; just think about it, you could die before you get to the end of this post.

The point is this: When aiming for a long distance goal, it’s in your best interest to consider whether or not the pursuit of said goal is something which you would die for. After all, you may never reach your goal, but you will have this moment, right now and nothing else.

Understanding that brings about a richer experience to life and your interactions with those around you. The words you say to others no longer leave your lips without pleasure but instead tingle your tongue. The moments you spend with others become colorful and vibrant like the butterfly. Listening to another persons experience is now an enjoyable intimacy to be savored. No longer tedious, are the things which you do; they are now soul enriching and bring a rewarding sense of purpose to your every movement.

Imagine what kind of amazing things you could do if you did things that you were willing to be caught dead doing – what would happen if you did things that you were willing to die for? You’d be a fearless warrior! In addition to that, if you will start to do what you will die for, you will start to see a frenzied increase of excessive passion for what you do in this life.

This sort of passion is the strongest I know.

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